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Islamic Arranged Marriages: The Social “Norm”

Islamic Marriage Invitations

Islamic culture is very supportive of marriage, promoting the joining of two people to love one another as they live in accordance with the commandments of Allah. Marriage is seen in the Qur’an as the only way for the sexes to unite; individuals who wish to participate in sexual activities outside of marriage violates their obedience to Allah. However, Islamic culture does not typically promote dating, so the families participate in arranging a marriage that is beneficial to the bride, the groom, and their families.

Benefits of an Arranged Marriage

Families pick the potential spouse of their son or daughter with care, making it possible to have a long and loving marriage. By arranging the marriage, you are more likely to have shared values and a close family life. One of the biggest benefits is the newly blossomed love between two people who may not have had any relationships before this moment, preserving their innocence and preventing comparison to others. Many more benefits contribute to having an arranged marriage.

Requirements of the Bride and Groom

Both participants in an arranged union must take on certain responsibilities. The husband is responsible for the wife’s “maintenance,” essentially meaning that he must keep his new wife healthy, safe, and well-groomed. He must provide his wife with a maid if she is unable to perform household duties. The husband must also provide his wife with mahr, a gift that can be tangible or a service at either the time of the wedding or a later day.

The wife is responsible for the well-being of her husband. By the laws of Allah, she must be faithful, trustworthy, and honest. She is prohibited from engaging in sexual activity with anyone, apart from her husband. The wife also must not refuse her husband’s sexual advances. As the husband and wife embark on their new marriage, abiding by these responsibilities makes the union harmonious.

Arranged, Not Forced

Marriages are often arranged in Islamic culture since Muslims do not “date” in the way that individuals in North American do. Since the families of individuals looking to marry often know them best, tradition dictates that the family unanimously decides on the characteristics, morals, and values that are the most important for a potential mate. This arrangement promotes the couple as part of a family, rather than two people deciding to embark on a life of their own.

Getting Started

If you are of Islamic faith and want to get married, let your family know so they can begin their search. Soon, you will be picking out Islamic marriage invitation cards to request the presence of your friends and family at your wedding ceremony. The wedding ceremony usually involves many or all of the friends and family that were involved in your courting and arrangement, making the ceremony a special time for everyone as you blend your families together.


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